Events by Divine Creations | October 2013
Events by Divine Creations

5 Ways to Spot Deception

by Valerie DiVecchio 24. October 2013 12:17
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"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive" - Sir Walter Scott.  A little white lie never hurt anybody, right?  Well, when you are preparing for your wedding day, that couldn't be further from the truth.  And no, I'm not talking about between you and your fiance/ fiancee (although this definitely pertains to that too!), I'm talking about between you and the vendors you are looking to hire for your picture perfect day.

You do your due diligence, research your vendors and pick those you want to interview.  How can you tell if what they are telling you is the truth or something you want to hear?  I've said time and time again... if it's not in writing, it does not exist.  If they promise you the moon, but refuse to put it in writing - RUN, don't walk to the nearest exit!  That's just setting up to be a disaster.  Remember what mama said... "if it's too good to be true, it probably is!".

But is there a way to potentially figure out if someone is being truthful when you sit down for that initial interview.  According to Robin Lavitch of Surpass Your Goal, a local coaching, consulting and training firm, there are ways to increase your awareness when dealing with vendors who might not be the most ethical.

5 ways to spot deception:

1.  Change in hand gestures:  Men will contain their movements, while women will increase their movements.

2.  Shifting positions:  The lower part of the body will provide cues to deception with increases in shuffling feet, legs will cross and uncross, and an overall wiggle or squiggle when sitting.

3. Face touching:  Touching the nose (Pinocchio's nose) or even covering the mouth when speaking.

4.  Tone changes in speech:  The tone is higher at the end of a sentence when someone is being deceptive and they may struggle to get the words out so they may stutter and stammer more.

5.  Maximizing body touches:  Someone who is deceptive will demonstrate pacifying behaviors.  Those are behaviors that we exhibit to reduce our own nervousness, such as chin stroking, hair grooming, lip licking, or eyebrow scratching.

Robin recommends being cautious that these signals are indicative of increased anxiety or nervousness which is an avenue to spot deception.  But do be aware that not everyone who scratches their nose is trying to deceive you... it just might be an itchy nose!  It's more about looking at a series of behaviors.

There are tons of vendors out there what have your best interests at heart, but unfortunately in my 16 years worth of experience in the industry, I've run across a few who can be classified as "shady".  I'm not suggesting that you become skeptical of every vendor you meet, but maybe with a little more knowledge you can be totally comfortable that everything you envision for your wedding will come true thanks to hiring reliable and trustworthy vendors!

For more information on Robin's upcoming classes and services, check out her website at


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Valerie DiVecchio Valerie DiVecchio

Divine Creations

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